Week 33..getting off track made me lose a week in there…

Yes, it has been 33 weeks.  Some how I got way behind on my blogging, but it is indeed 33 weeks!  Week 33 has been a week of really seeing how far I have come, but through different eyes.  It was a week of really realizing just how important meetings are.  It was a week of indulgences and being really honest with myself.  It was definitely a week!

I affectionately call Week 33 “hell week”.  It wasn’t hell week because of Weight Watchers, it was “hell week” because work was very, very busy.  I recently increased my hours from 25hrs/week to 37hrs/week at work.  This is a change that will last through the holiday rush.  And in Week 33,  I worked even MORE hours because of a rush we were having.  And to add to everything else, my husband has been having a rough month or so at work as well.  We work for the same company which is usually great, but sometimes, (like “hell week”) its not such a great idea to have us working for the same company.  It makes it a bit difficult to leave work at work.  Anyway, it was a rough week in case you didn’t get that already.

So Tuesday (which for this Blog’s purpose) was the beginning of my Weight Watcher week..the beginning of Week 33.  That night, I can’t for the life of me remember what I made for actual dinner.  But for dessert, we had Brownie Sundaes and there was NOTHING lite about it.  I figured, hey, its just once this week, I can indulge!  No one held a gun to my head. I made the choice.  Truth be told, I didn’t even like the sundae. I should have just had the brownie without all the extra stuff.  The problem is, it didn’t stop at Tuesday night.  It kept going with diet cokes and chocolate donuts.  It kept going with kit kats and diet coke for afternoon snacks.  It just kept going.

It was a rough week.  I was PMSing.  I made choices that were not the best for me.  Great, so let’s pick myself up, dust myself off and keep moving forward!

Naomi came home from school on Friday or maybe Monday before Week 33 weigh in.  She had a sheet of paper to track exercise activity that she does outside of school. If she colors in all of the stars before December 7 she will get a free ticket to Laser Tag.  She was so excited!  “Look, Mom!  With all the stuff I do now this will be easy!  I got this last year, but I didn’t even bother cause I never did anything.”   That is when it hit me!  Yes, I have lost weight, I have gone down sizes, I am no longer prediabetic or have high blood pressure.  Yes, I have run several races this year.  Yes I have done my 25 derby laps in under 5 minutes. All of those things are amazing accomplishments  However, what I am the most proud of is the way changing my life has changed my daughter’s!  I am most proud of the effect I  have made in the way she looks at life.  She looks forward to exercising and being active!  I have gotten her off the couch!  To me, this breaking of this obesity cycle is AS important to me as breaking that cycle of abuse I had to break when I had kids!

This realization of what has changed in my daughter’s life has really given me something else to think about and hold tight to.  Whenever I feel the need to use food as my comfort (like I did during Week 33), I need to remember how what I do affects my daughter and be grateful for the change and remember that I am her role model!

So going into Week 33’s weigh in, I knew there would be some weight gain. My scale at home said there would be.  I wasn’t sure how big the jump would be, but true to form, my body always gains a bit of weight at PMS time.  (Well at least more times than not)  And let’s face it, last week, I had my fair share of unhealthy meals and snacks!  I would have deserved any extra weight I put back on.  And I was ready and willing to own it as I stepped on the scale.  I didn’t feel guilty.  I just needed to be accountable.  It would have been easy to say, “No thanks.  I want to take a pass on the scale this week”  But the truth of the matter is, I NEEDED to see what I was doing to my body.  I needed to be held accountable.  So I stepped on the scale.  I was only up .4# this week.  That is nothing really.

After I stepped on the scale, I went into my meeting.  I NEEDED to be there.  I needed to talk about my comfort food eating.  I needed to  hear myself say the words. I needed to hear myself find my own answers.  I needed to feel that support from my friends who are on this journey with me.  This week, 33 weeks in, I really felt the IMPORTANCE of the Weight Watchers meeting.  Before my meeting I was feeling down on myself, and I was fighting myself to really be honest and to stay on track.  After the meeting I felt completely different.  I felt free of all of that “pre-meeting guilt and shame”.  I was so much lighter feeling after my meeting.  I am so grateful for my commitment to this process.  I am grateful to my amazing leader, Paula.  And I am grateful for each person who shares their stories, triumphs, and struggles in the meeting.

Week 33 was definitely a week to go inward and really look at where I am and where I am come from and what do I really want from this journey.  And more importantly, what am I will to give to myself to keep this journey going?  What is my WHY????

The answer???  Breaking this cycle of obesity.  Being the positive example to my daughter.  Taking better care of myself and living a healthy and active lifestyle.  Plain and simple.

Weeks 30 and 31 come RIGHT before 32!

I have been a very bad blogger!  I have neglected my blogging project for 2 weeks, but I have NOT neglected the reasons this blog exists!  So that is a good thing!

Week 30 found me releasing another 1.2# and Week 32 found me releasing 1.6# for a total of 42# released!  Go me!

After some stalling out there for a little bit, it seems as though I have found my groove again.  Not only have I found my groove and started releasing weight again, but I also released some of my beloved Weight Watchers Points Plus Points!  I am down to the lowest you can get…29 points, and I’m not really feeling it.  I have heard for so long the women complain that they just can’t get enough to eat with 29 points or they can’t lose weight with just 29 points.  I don’t know.  So far, so good.  I’m getting plenty of food and I’m losing weight still.

My exercising has slowed down a bit.  I used to hit the exercise hard 6 days a week.  Now I am more at 4-5 times a week.  I need to be more consistent with my workouts.  (This I know).  But I am loving Zumba, Party Power Sculpt and Belly Dancing once a week with some running thrown in first thing in the mornings once or twice a week.

I am still training for the Honolulu Marathon, but the training has slowed down a great deal as I am dealing with cranky knees (and toes).  My running buddy and I ran Barber to Boise (a 10K…6.2 miles) in week 31 and we finished in 1 hours 29 minutes.  That was a great pace, and I am hoping we can keep it up in Honolulu.  Either way, I know we will laugh and have a great time..after all we are racing to her wedding alter!  Can’t wait!

After the race, we all met to watch Michelle’s fiance’ play his softball tournament.  I got dressed up in a pair of my nice jeans and wore my race shirt and some nice shoes. I know I felt good, but that night as I was sitting there with Michelle, who is a total hottie in her own right, and my husband was nowhere near me, I looked up in the dug out and there was a guy checking me out!  ME!!!!  I looked down and continued chatting with Michelle and when I looked back up at him, there he was busted again and making a very quick smile and looking down again.  *laugh*  Not gonna lie, that felt damn good!  He was a cutie!  I don’t know the last time I had some guy check me out that way!

You know there are still times when I catch myself in the mirror and wonder who the heck that was in the mirror.  I just don’t look like myself.  And I also find myself still thinking I wear a much bigger size than I do or saying to my friend Michelle when she offered me her knee brace, “Your brace will never fit my fat legs!”  She looked at my knees and said, “Your knees are thinner than mine!”  Sure enough, her brace fit me!  I guess I still need to work on the “fat girl mentality”.  I’m not that woman anymore.. I am healthy and strong and getting healthier every day!

As I continue losing weight and going to my meetings I realize just how happy I am to continue losing slow and steady. I’m in no big hurry.  I just want it to stay off.  This is going to be a permanent change and that is all that matters.  However, with that said..I’m sooooo close to ONEderland!!!

Week 30 Winners Finish, Finishers Win

Week 30 found me opening up a package from Transformation.com!!!!  It finally came!!  My award from Transformation.com.   It was a t-shirt with the logo “Winners Finish, Finishers Win”, a medal, some Right Light protein drinks and a really cool Certificate saying among other things that I am an inspiration.  It made me cry!  I got this because I finished the 8 Week Super Summer Challenge at Transformation.com.  And I found the saying on the t-shirt pretty profound.

    

Winners Fishing, Finishers Win.  I started this whole blog because I wanted to commit to 52 weeks and not give up when I got frustrated or complacent.  I wanted to FINISH something I set my mind too.  It’s  like training for a marathon.  Lots of people  start, but not everyone finishes!  In a marathon it’s all about putting one step in front of the other because each step brings you closer to that finish line.  It’s not always about the time you finish in, but it is ALWAYS about the fact that you finished!

When you have a bunch of weight to lose, it’s not about how fast you lose it.  It’s about finishing!  It’s about getting it all off and being healthy!  It’s about what you learn about yourself, nutrition, and a healthy lifestyle.

How many times along this weight loss journey have you thought about quitting?  I can tell you that I have thought about quitting about a dozen times.  I get tired and complacent.  But I remember it’s about finishing!!!!  That is why you will see me set a new goal or start a new challenge.  I need something to keep me focused and keep me on track.  I need that carrot dangling in front of me to keep me moving.

I AM GOING TO FINISH THIS!!!!  I am going to finish 52 weeks, and then I will keep on going until I have released the proper amount of weight and reach the healthy BMI!

With that in mind, last week I released another 1.6 for a total of 39.2#!  Soooo close to another 5# star.  A little over 9# away from reaching my second 10% released.  I am 8# from being 199…ONEderland!!!  I GOT THIS!!!!